“Can you please hurry up? I am getting late”, Kittunni shouted.
“For God's sake please stop eating my head Kittu. It's only 4:30 pm. Reenu's birthday party is at 5 pm”, Manjulla replied in an even louder voice.
“Exactly! I am getting late”. Kittunni couldn't understand why his mother is not able to understand the importance of punctuality.
“It's not as if you need to go to airport to catch a plane. Its just next door damn it!!!”, Manjulla said exasperated.
“All the more important that I should be on time. What will they think of me otherwise?”, Kittunni asked looking at the mirror to adjust his hair.
“Trust me they will be happy if you go a little late”, Manjulla replied.
“No way! They would want me to be the first to arrive. That's what neighbors are for”
“Kittu, they will not be ready by 5 pm. When they say 5 pm they would expect people to come only by 6 pm”, Manjulla tried to explain.
“Hey, just because you started my birthday party 1 hour late doesn't mean everyone is like you”, Kittunni retorted.
“Oh yeah! And how many of your friends turned up at 5 pm for your birthday eh?”, Manjulla questioned.
“Its not my fault I got dumbos as friends. I will show them the right way to do it.”, Kittunni responded.
“I give up. You go. Do whatever you want”, Manulla replied shaking her head.
“Hello! Dress me up first. Discharge your mother duties properly”, Kittunni replied back shaking his head also.
Finally, on the dot when clock struck 5 PM, Kittunni was ready.
“Don't wait for me for dinner. Not sure when I will be back”, Kittunni said as he went out of the door not bothering to turn back.
2 mins later Kittunni was back, anger written all over the place.
“Oh! Mister Hotshot is back. Hope you had a great time at the party”, Manjulla said in a sarcastic tone.
“It's 5 PM and they are just cleaning the house! Can you believe that?”, Kittunni asked incredulously.
“Oh yes I definitely can!”, Manjulla said laughing out loud.
Suddenly someone entered the house. It was the birthday girl Reenu.
“Reenu?”, Kittuni asked surprised. “What are you doing here following me back to my house?”
“My mama told me to come and sit with you till the house is clean. Thanks for inviting me in Kittu”
“When did I invite you?”, asked Kittunni
“Haha Oh Kittu you are so funny”, Reenu laughed giving a slight tap on Kittunni's right cheek.
“Hey!”, Kittunni cried out massaging his right cheek and looking at Reenu. “Stupid Girl”, he thought, but he restrained himself. Kittunni who was already angry dealing with unpunctual parents and neighbors, was getting really pissed off but he knew he couldn't let small things like getting slapped on one's face get in the way. He had a bigger goal that day - The Holy Grail. And that was in Reenu's house - The Return Gift.
To kill time Kittunni started watching TV. Reenu was more interested in Kittu's toys which were all around the house.
Half an hour later Kittunni was still in front of the TV, getting more irritated by the minute as he watched Reenu play with his toys.
“Useless girl!”, he thought. “Still in her pyjamas even after half an hour after the party was supposed to start. Hasn't her parents taught her anything?”
Kittunni considered the option of leaving Reenu in his house and going over to Reenu's house once again to try his luck. But then he realised that plan was a deadend - without the birthday girl cutting the birthday cake there is no way he was going to get his return gift. Another option was to ask her to leave his house and get ready but that plan too had its risk - Reenu can blacklist him from the birthday guest list.
As he was contemplating different options to get the birthday party kickstarted, Reenu suddenly turned to face him
“Kittu do you think I need to get ready?”, she asked innocently
“Is she really asking me whether she needs to get ready for HER birthday???”, he thought. Trying hard to put on a smile he said, “A wonderful idea Reenu. Please do”.
Finally at 6 PM the party started.
By 6:30 Kittunni was back again
“Back so fast?”, Manjulla asked looking surprised.
Kittunni did not reply. He was holding a big carry bag.
“Wow Kittu looks like you got a big return gift. Congrats”, Manjulla said. Kittunni did not reply. He looked very angry. Without uttering a single work he held out the carry bag in front of Manjulla and asked her to look inside. Manjulla peeped inside to see what it was. Deep down lay a tiny object. She put in her hand and took it out.
“A lollypop?”, she asked in a confused tone
“Is this a joke?”, Kittunni said in an angry tone, frustration written all over his face. “Is this even a return gift? Whom do they think I am - a 3 year old?”.
“Hahahahaha”, Manjulla just couldn't control her laughter.
“And to think I spent Rs.500 for that stupid Chess Set”, Kittunni continued.
“Who spent?”, Manjulla asked with a raised eyebrow and both hands folded across the chest.
“You spent, I spent all same. That is not the point. Rs.500 vs Rs.5. What a waste of money. Instead of that Chess Set I could have just brought a Dairy Milk chocolate. I wouldn't have felt this angry”
“Kittu you should not measure a gift with its money. Learn to accept whatever you receive”, Manjulla said.
“Easy for you to say. You don't know what all I imagined seeing that big carry bag. All of that got crushed by a teeny weeny lollypop. Why do you need a bag of my size to keep a lollypop”
Manjulla was trying hard to suppress her laughter so as to respect Kttunni's feelings
Suddenly Reenu came running in. She was very excited
“Kittu how was my party. Hope you liked everything”
“Yeah Reenu it was fantastic. The best part was the lollypop. Thank you”, Kittunni replied sarcastically
“Oh you are welcome sweetie”, Reenu said giving a tap on Kittunni right cheek.
“Stop slapping me girl!”, Kittunni cried out, holding his right cheek
“Haha Auntie, Kittu is so funny no?”, this time giving a tap on the left cheek
"Aaarghhh", Kittunni cried out. He was losing it. This day has not at all gone according to his plans. Unaware of Kittunni's inner feelings, Reenu continued
“Kittu you know what? I got so many presents. A super racing car, a very nice looking Dart game, a nail polish set. Some idiot gave me a junk Chess Set, but other than that all other presents were very nice. Who gives a Chess Set as birthday present, no Kittu?”
That was it. The final nail on the coffin. Kittunni turned towards Manjulla. A silent communication transpired between them
“Either you kick this good-for-nothing girl out of my house or I swear I will do it”
Manjulla got the cue. She silently went over to Reenu to talk to her. When she came back, Kittu was busy browsing her mobile
“What are you doing?”, she asked.
“Planning for my birthday”, Kittunni replied without even looking up from his mobile
“But that is 10 months away!”, Manjulla replied
“Don't care. I am ordering the smallest size lollypop that I can on Amazon today. This lollypop I will give it to her as her return gift”
“But in 10 months this lollypop will get spoilt”
An evil smile spread across Kittunni's face.
“If my return gift was a good lollypop, then she will get a spoilt one! Revenge is best served cold Manju!”. With this, Kittunni went back to put in motion his plan to be executed in 10 months time.
